12 years ago my sweet darling Charlene left and took our seven kids with her, I was devastated to say the least.
Fast-forward 10 years of pain and no hope, little ol me happens to stumble upon this piece of art. This is the spark I needed to find joy in the little things in life once again.
It was like a switch was flipped overnight, I know longer mourned my past life with Charlene. I took this new spark as a sign to head down to the local tavern. There I met a kind man named Bill. He was wonderful and introduced me into the swingers scene. Within days I had compiled an exquisite roster of charming ladies, it seemed that this couch sure was a hit! The only downside was I struggled lasting a satisfactory time due to the dazzling purple eyes of the gorilla staring into mine.
To this day I continue to enjoy the comfort of these ladies on the couch, and as a plus the kids all love piling up on it for movie night when they come and visit!
I did a lot of research on Jubilee leather sectionals over a year before I pulled the trigger and purchased one. I most worried about the build quality, comfort and possible shipping damage after reading some negative reviews online. With that being said. I received my Bewley white Italian leather sectional (in stock) exactly 30 days including the day I ordered it to the day it was delivered (NV to OH). The ONLY issue I had was the delivery people said they would deliver it between 8 AM to 12 PM and they did not deliver it until 4:40 PM. However, they did a great job bringing in the sectional pieces and were very courteous. Definitely make sure you pay extra to have them bring the pieces in. I unwrapped the pieces and put the pieces together by myself easily. There was no shipping damage. I could not find a single defect anywhere, it was perfect and I was blown away by the build quality and it being stunningly beautiful. It is more beautiful in person than in pictures or video. You will not find a sectional anywhere else like this modern style. This is a high quality sectional. As far as comfort, it is firm being brand new. On a scale of 0 to 10 in terms of comfort, I would say a 5. However, I expected that from reading the reviews, they say the more it wears in over time the more comfortable it will get. It is not uncomfortable, just firm and when you adjust the headrest up it is more comfortable. The build quality is a 10. The white leather is not glove soft but a much more durable leather, so it should last long. Overall, I'm very pleased and get high praise from friends and family for its beauty and aesthetic appeal. I highly recommend this Jubilee Bewley leather sectional from my experience so far.
I ordered the chair for me and john pork to chill but tim cheese came and took john pork, then bombardilo crocodilo flew and bombed the chair, my brother got stuck but tralalero tralala saved me and ran away to the forrest but brr brr patapim ran after me and i am stuck
so i oredered him with pink fuz for the huzz but yesturday i caught my brother absolutley gooning on it so the gorrila was like heck no aliveanized himself and the roof went kaboomey i swear ro i need a refund and the companys being sued for killing my brother proffeser pork and damaging my 20,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 dolar house and becasue my monkey is now gooning gone im so sad i think im gonna mew myself to sleep
I had only intended to fetch a glass of water. A simple errand, driven by the parched desperation that accompanies a fitful night’s sleep. But what I found in the den on that wretched night has since clung to my mind like a cursed algorithm, looping endlessly in grotesque perpetuity.
It was the dead of night, the house swathed in the sort of silence that leaves one straining to hear the phantom chimes of non-existent Discord notifications. My descent down the staircase was cautious, each step cushioned by the thin veneer of carpet laid bare from years of neglect.
The den should have been empty. I should have been greeted only by the cold glow of the television, left on by some act of absentmindedness. But as I drew closer, I became aware of a sound—low, guttural, and punctuated by words strung together like errant memes vomited forth from a corrupted AI.
“Bingus… Bingus… the drip immaculate…”
My father’s voice. But not his voice. No, it was distorted—laced with a mania so profound that I scarcely recognized it. I rounded the corner, throat clenched tight with a horror I could scarcely comprehend.
And there he sat. Skeet Johnson, my father. Perched upon that damned Gorilla Chair as if it were some foul throne of delirium.
Its form was meant to mimic a silverback gorilla, molded in the act of a triumphant roar. But to my eyes, it appeared as a beast of torment, its exaggerated musculature cradling my father in an embrace far too intimate. The arms of the chair wrapped around him like a lover’s desperate grasp, locking him in a ritual of depravity I could not fathom.
“Father?” I croaked, my voice feeble. He scarcely reacted, his eyes glued to some unseen reverie like a YouTube reaction channel feeding on endless, vapid content.
“Caught slippin’, eh, son?” he cackled, the sound unnatural and jagged. “This… this is the true grindset. The ultimate rizz.”
“What are you talking about?” I whispered, clutching my own arms as if to ward off the chill seeping into my bones. “You look… mad.”
“Madness?” he laughed, a laugh so discordant and vile it reminded me of a bass-boosted meme blasted through cheap Bluetooth speakers. “No, son. This is the drip. The forbidden sauce. The way Baby Gronk rizzed up Livvy Dunne, but, like, on a spiritual plane. I’m edging on enlightenment itself.”
I stood there, paralyzed, the raw stench of vape clouds and Taco Bell Baja Blast clinging to the air. His eyes were wild, his pupils swollen to inky chasms that swallowed all traces of reason.
“Father, you’ve lost yourself!” I screamed, though my voice cracked like a low-quality Vine snippet dredged from the depths of some forgotten meme archive.
“I’ve ascended, boy,” he ranted, his hands grasping the gorilla’s foam-muscled arms as though drawing sustenance from them. “The Gorilla Chair, it’s a lifestyle. A state of mind. The primal Goon.”
“No… no, this is madness!” I stumbled backward, desperate to flee. My father’s twisted form remained hunched upon the throne, eyes glazed and mouth agape with a joy so monstrous it twisted my stomach into knots.
“Go on, Skid. Run,” he sneered, his voice already fading into a deranged mumble. “But know this—the Gorilla Chair calls to us all. It’s inevitable.”
I bolted from the den, abandoning my quest for water. Instead, I sought refuge beneath my covers, the darkness of my room a fragile sanctuary against the madness that had overtaken my father.
Even now, weeks later, I hear him at night—rambling from the den, his words incomprehensible yet threaded with that same sickly cadence of obsession. And I fear, deep down, that his prophecy may be true.
For sometimes, in the shadows of my dreams, I can feel it. The cold, terrible lure of the Gorilla Chair.